So to give people an update who might be interested;
I've spoken to RIM in Nova Scotia and they've confirmed that the Hardware Vodafone is selling right now are all promo units - and they weren't even aware that Vodafone was selling the promo units.
I've spoken to everyone in customer service @ vodafone, and no one has a clue what they're talking about. I finally reached someone who knew what they were taking about - and they're getting someone in their department to email me a link to where I can download the new messenger.
I'm not even sure if this is going to work; if it doesn't; they've already agreed to send me another one tomorrow at no charge. So at least they're willing to replace the device due to lack of competence.