I just got my Pearl today and I'm a first time user to Blackberry. I can honestly say I'm very unimpressed so far. My menu button types a "W" and my Go Back button types an "x" So, basically, I am dead in the water. HELP!

Did you get it new? If so, take it back. If it's used, I'd say it got wet.

Yeah, it's brand new. I just got it in the box from Verizon today. There's no way to reload the OS and fix the issue?

Wirelessly posted

Really strange.

Nah, it's just my luck. This is my first Blackberry and I think I got too excited. I was destined to have a BOB.

No...take it back and get another one. That's not normal.

What's hilarious is that I couldn't figure out how to open up any applications for the life of me. I was thinking to myself "How the hell do people use these things??!?" Then I looked through the user guide and saw the "berry" icon labeled as "Menu" and knew something had to be wrong.

Just do a hard restart (take the battery out) and replace it. If it doesn't work the first time, then keep doing it. It will work eventually.