OK. I seem to have (cross my fingers) fixed this issue. The locking keypad wasn't it BUT, I did the following, and I haven't had any UMA connection problems:
Initially my routers were just set up to both be router / ap's on the same ssid and different channels. I was playing around with static ip's and forwarding ports but I tried the following and so far so good:
1) Restored both routers to factory defaults,
2) set up tmo router as a bridge and have my netgear (which is connected to the modem) coonected by ethernet cable to a numbered port/ not the "internet" port.
3) Disabled dhcp on the tmo router.
4) Both routers have same ssid and security but on different channels.
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